Unfortunately, it appears that things have taken a turn for the worst right now with my health. I planned to finish my last semester of law school in December, but things spiralled out of control very suddenly and I had to rush home to be taken care of by my family. I am too weak to tolerate any more chemo treatments and have basically been told I’m on my deathbed. But I still say fuck that – nobody is going to tell me when to die. This is just a rough patch along the way. This is why there have been no blog posts since September. I refuse to give up.
At this point, I have set aside pursuing my law degree because I believe in the grand scheme of things – it never really meant as much as the experience along the way and all it taught me about myself as a person. Tons of people are lawyers – some of them special, some of them not. I do not define myself by my career path alone – I am so much more as a human being ,and was meant to be so much more than this (yes I have a big ego).
Through my journey, there is so much to be thankful for – but it is mostly the people who have constantly been supporting me and cheering me on, sending me positive energy. First: my amazing family – my mom, older brother, aunts, cousins, family friends, friends from childhood, high school, university, law school, access and equity manager at law school, teachers, and professors, employers, Canadian Cancer Society volunteers, nurses etc. They have constantly given me hope and never faltered in their faith for me.
Also, my amazing team of chemo doctors and my palliative care doctor have been in my corner all along with world class healthcare for the treatment of pancreatic cancer. I could not have asked for anything more.
The ladies at the Pancreatic Cancer Canada Foundation have supported me personally through this experience.
My naturopath has been amazing and treated me with alternative therapies, including dealing with spiritual, mental, and emotional issues, and changing my lifestyle and diet.
Even new friends have become close friends right away.
I have taken trips this summer to Vegas and Montreal with close girlfriends, as well as completed an internship for my law degree with the Children’s Aid Society in Child Protection, which was an amazing practical experience for me. I learned so much just observing court proceedings in a single day than I would probably than in an entire month in law school. It really opened up my eyes to realize how fortunate I’ve been and taken for granted that I come from an amazing family/support system and there is an entire world out there I could have never imagined where children and families go through intense and complicated struggles.
I have led a charmed life. I really have. I’ve been spoiled and surrounded by love and happiness. But I do not take anything for granted.
I hope that by writing this, I can help others going through similar journeys in some small way.